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Author Topic: Dominion jokes/pick-up lines  (Read 66320 times)

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Erick648

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Re: Dominion jokes/pick-up lines
« Reply #100 on: July 01, 2016, 12:38:04 pm »
+58
"I don't understand Catapult.  If I Catapult Estate, it does nothing, if I Catapult Copper, it's a gimped Militia, and Catapulting more expensive cards doesn't seem worth it."

"Catapult Rocks."

"Really? How do I get it to rock? I don't see it."

"That's because you didn't buy enough Catapults. You need to buy all the Catapults to get to Rocks."

"Buy all the Catapults? You mean it has self-synergy, like, I Catapult Catapults?"

"No, Catapult Rocks."

"Okay, it's too good to trash, then; so what do I trash with it? If only there was a way to turn Coppers into Silvers so I could use them."

"But there is a way: Mine."

"And what is your way of turning Coppers into Silvers?"

"I just told you: it's Mine."

"And your strategy is...?"

"My strategy is Mine."

"So that's how you're going to be, huh?  Hoard your strategies for getting Silvers?"

"No, Hoard's my strategy for getting Golds."

"Very well, keep your strategies to yourself, oh, great prince of tactictians!"

"Prince of Tacticians isn't great; in fact, it doesn't work at all."

"You're telling me."

"Yes, I did."

"Fine, then, if you won't tell me how to get expensive treasures to Catapult can you at least suggest a different attack?"

"Witch."

"Let's go with a curser."

"Okay, Witch."

"I don't know, pick any curser."

"I said, Witch."

"No, you didn't. Which is a curser?"

"Exactly."

"AAARGH... forget it! Good night!"

"Sir Michael!"
« Last Edit: July 01, 2016, 12:40:25 pm by Erick648 »
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Witherweaver

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Re: Dominion jokes/pick-up lines
« Reply #101 on: July 01, 2016, 01:43:13 pm »
+5
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Minotaur

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Re: Dominion jokes/pick-up lines
« Reply #102 on: July 01, 2016, 04:22:01 pm »
+1
"Well, I have $4.  I sure hope there's a good $4 card on the board.  Scout for one?"

"You dumbass."
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Storyteller/Crown is Donald's Vietnam Watergate.  Alchemy is Donald's Vietnam.  Scout is the time Donald choked on a pretzel.

Minotaur

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Re: Dominion jokes/pick-up lines
« Reply #103 on: July 04, 2016, 04:39:21 pm »
+2
"Mine Silver."

"If you're going to LARP this whole game of Dominion like it's your first Renn Faire, then I'm out."
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Storyteller/Crown is Donald's Vietnam Watergate.  Alchemy is Donald's Vietnam.  Scout is the time Donald choked on a pretzel.

Seprix

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Re: Dominion jokes/pick-up lines
« Reply #104 on: July 04, 2016, 07:52:30 pm »
0
*Makes jokes about Conquest, Dominate, Triumph, Delve, and Advance*
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Minotaur

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Re: Dominion jokes/pick-up lines
« Reply #105 on: July 05, 2016, 11:51:26 pm »
+6
*makes awesome joke worthy of 200 upvotes*
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Storyteller/Crown is Donald's Vietnam Watergate.  Alchemy is Donald's Vietnam.  Scout is the time Donald choked on a pretzel.

LibraryAdventurer

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Re: Dominion jokes/pick-up lines
« Reply #106 on: July 06, 2016, 12:10:19 am »
+3
Quote from: Minotaur on July 05, 2016, 11:51:26 pm
*makes awesome joke worthy of 200 upvotes*
nice try.
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Re: Dominion jokes/pick-up lines
« Reply #107 on: July 06, 2016, 09:27:13 am »
0
Quote from: Minotaur on July 05, 2016, 11:51:26 pm
*makes awesome joke worthy of 200 upvotes*

Denominated in units of 0.01. 
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Seprix

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Re: Dominion jokes/pick-up lines
« Reply #108 on: July 06, 2016, 09:50:51 am »
+1
Quote from: Minotaur on July 05, 2016, 11:51:26 pm
*makes awesome joke worthy of 200 upvotes*

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Re: Dominion jokes/pick-up lines
« Reply #109 on: July 06, 2016, 09:51:05 am »
+28
I picked up a album by my favorite band at the store. I wondered why it was so cheap, but then I realized they played a lot of bridges.
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Trogdor the Burninator

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Re: Dominion jokes/pick-up lines
« Reply #110 on: July 30, 2016, 12:54:37 am »
0
Quote from: ThetaSigma12 on July 06, 2016, 09:51:05 am
I picked up a album by my favorite band at the store. I wondered why it was so cheap, but then I realized they played a lot of bridges.


For all we know they could've been spending a lot of time on the Highways.
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Roadrunner7671

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Re: Dominion jokes/pick-up lines
« Reply #111 on: July 30, 2016, 01:22:26 am »
0
Why did the Scout cross the road?
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Re: Dominion jokes/pick-up lines
« Reply #112 on: July 30, 2016, 01:24:55 am »
0
Quote from: ThetaSigma12 on July 06, 2016, 09:51:05 am
I picked up a album by my favorite band at the store. I wondered why it was so cheap, but then I realized they played a lot of bridges.

Seven bridges?
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Minotaur

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Re: Dominion jokes/pick-up lines
« Reply #113 on: July 30, 2016, 08:02:16 am »
+1
Quote from: Roadrunner7671 on July 30, 2016, 01:22:26 am
Why did the Scout cross the road?

To get to the Great Hall?
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Storyteller/Crown is Donald's Vietnam Watergate.  Alchemy is Donald's Vietnam.  Scout is the time Donald choked on a pretzel.

Minotaur

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Re: Dominion jokes/pick-up lines
« Reply #114 on: July 30, 2016, 08:03:46 am »
+2
Scout, Pearl Diver, and Transmute are in a plane crash.  Who survives?
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Storyteller/Crown is Donald's Vietnam Watergate.  Alchemy is Donald's Vietnam.  Scout is the time Donald choked on a pretzel.

Seprix

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Re: Dominion jokes/pick-up lines
« Reply #115 on: July 30, 2016, 11:58:39 am »
+7
Quote from: Minotaur on July 30, 2016, 08:03:46 am
Scout, Pearl Diver, and Transmute are in a plane crash.  Who survives?

Society?
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Seprix

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Re: Dominion jokes/pick-up lines
« Reply #116 on: July 30, 2016, 12:02:31 pm »
+6
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singletee

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Re: Dominion jokes/pick-up lines
« Reply #117 on: July 30, 2016, 01:00:10 pm »
+22
Quote from: Minotaur on July 30, 2016, 08:03:46 am
Scout, Pearl Diver, and Transmute are in a plane crash.  Who survives?

Survivors
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Minotaur

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Re: Dominion jokes/pick-up lines
« Reply #118 on: July 30, 2016, 01:20:49 pm »
+3
Quote from: singletee on July 30, 2016, 01:00:10 pm
Quote from: Minotaur on July 30, 2016, 08:03:46 am
Scout, Pearl Diver, and Transmute are in a plane crash.  Who survives?

Survivors

I was thinking your strategy or deck or something like that, but this works.
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Storyteller/Crown is Donald's Vietnam Watergate.  Alchemy is Donald's Vietnam.  Scout is the time Donald choked on a pretzel.

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Re: Dominion jokes/pick-up lines
« Reply #119 on: July 31, 2016, 08:23:46 am »
0
Quote from: singletee on July 30, 2016, 01:24:55 am
Quote from: ThetaSigma12 on July 06, 2016, 09:51:05 am
I picked up a album by my favorite band at the store. I wondered why it was so cheap, but then I realized they played a lot of bridges.

Seven bridges?
Over seven Bridges you must go?
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teamrocketgrunt

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Re: Dominion jokes/pick-up lines
« Reply #120 on: August 04, 2016, 03:13:23 am »
0
Quote from: Minotaur on July 30, 2016, 08:03:46 am
Scout, Pearl Diver, and Transmute are in a plane crash.  Who survives?

Is this going to be a Pearl Harbor joke?

EDIT: No, it wasn't. Not even close. Aaaaanyway..
« Last Edit: August 04, 2016, 03:19:38 am by teamrocketgrunt »
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Minotaur

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Re: Dominion jokes/pick-up lines
« Reply #121 on: August 04, 2016, 03:30:55 am »
+3
Quote from: teamrocketgrunt on August 04, 2016, 03:13:23 am
Quote from: Minotaur on July 30, 2016, 08:03:46 am
Scout, Pearl Diver, and Transmute are in a plane crash.  Who survives?

Is this going to be a Pearl Harbor joke?

EDIT: No, it wasn't. Not even close. Aaaaanyway..

It's a reference to the standard joke about politicians in a plane crash.  X, Y, Z are in a plane crash.  Who survives? (Country) W.
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Storyteller/Crown is Donald's Vietnam Watergate.  Alchemy is Donald's Vietnam.  Scout is the time Donald choked on a pretzel.

teamrocketgrunt

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Re: Dominion jokes/pick-up lines
« Reply #122 on: August 04, 2016, 06:45:32 am »
0
Quote from: Minotaur on August 04, 2016, 03:30:55 am
Quote from: teamrocketgrunt on August 04, 2016, 03:13:23 am
Quote from: Minotaur on July 30, 2016, 08:03:46 am
Scout, Pearl Diver, and Transmute are in a plane crash.  Who survives?

Is this going to be a Pearl Harbor joke?

EDIT: No, it wasn't. Not even close. Aaaaanyway..

It's a reference to the standard joke about politicians in a plane crash.  X, Y, Z are in a plane crash.  Who survives? (Country) W.

No, I got that. I was trying to joke that the association between Scout, Pearl Diver, Transmute and "plane crashes" was Pearl Harbor. So Pearl Diver would be the one to survive. Then, I read that you had already revealed what you thought and my already unfunny comment became even less funny.
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Re: Dominion jokes/pick-up lines
« Reply #123 on: August 04, 2016, 08:54:17 am »
+1
Quote from: teamrocketgrunt on August 04, 2016, 06:45:32 am
Quote from: Minotaur on August 04, 2016, 03:30:55 am
Quote from: teamrocketgrunt on August 04, 2016, 03:13:23 am
Quote from: Minotaur on July 30, 2016, 08:03:46 am
Scout, Pearl Diver, and Transmute are in a plane crash.  Who survives?

Is this going to be a Pearl Harbor joke?

EDIT: No, it wasn't. Not even close. Aaaaanyway..

It's a reference to the standard joke about politicians in a plane crash.  X, Y, Z are in a plane crash.  Who survives? (Country) W.

No, I got that. I was trying to joke that the association between Scout, Pearl Diver, Transmute and "plane crashes" was Pearl Harbor. So Pearl Diver would be the one to survive. Then, I read that you had already revealed what you thought and my already unfunny comment became even less funny.

There, there. We can't all be funny :).
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Minotaur

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Re: Dominion jokes/pick-up lines
« Reply #124 on: August 04, 2016, 04:55:16 pm »
0
Quote from: McGarnacle on August 04, 2016, 08:54:17 am
Quote from: teamrocketgrunt on August 04, 2016, 06:45:32 am
Quote from: Minotaur on August 04, 2016, 03:30:55 am
Quote from: teamrocketgrunt on August 04, 2016, 03:13:23 am
Quote from: Minotaur on July 30, 2016, 08:03:46 am
Scout, Pearl Diver, and Transmute are in a plane crash.  Who survives?

Is this going to be a Pearl Harbor joke?

EDIT: No, it wasn't. Not even close. Aaaaanyway..

It's a reference to the standard joke about politicians in a plane crash.  X, Y, Z are in a plane crash.  Who survives? (Country) W.

No, I got that. I was trying to joke that the association between Scout, Pearl Diver, Transmute and "plane crashes" was Pearl Harbor. So Pearl Diver would be the one to survive. Then, I read that you had already revealed what you thought and my already unfunny comment became even less funny.

There, there. We can't all be funny :).

I think they're capable, but I didn't feel it this time.
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Storyteller/Crown is Donald's Vietnam Watergate.  Alchemy is Donald's Vietnam.  Scout is the time Donald choked on a pretzel.
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