So. Let me try one last time. This is me trying, okay? If it doesn't work out, I will just leave the game since I am not having fun. I hope it doesn't get to that, but we're pretty close.
So, first, yuma (and everyone else I guess), I would like for you to consider things the way the look from my point of view. The game is going pretty normally, then I vote for yuma. Directly after this vote, the yuma thing starts (I think that is what I will call it; feel free to call it the faust thing or whatever, I have no desire to get into a fight about how my wording of things pushes people in a certain direction or something).
Now I think people on this forum might have realized by now that I do not feel comfortable in emotional fights. I prefer to have productive discussions without getting personal. People might have seen that I am usually quicker to view the civility pledge as violated than others are. This is why, and for all I know, this is a known fact.
So what yuma's reaction achieves is waking a desire in me to stop voting for him because then we hopefully will not have this whole fight that I really don't want to have. Maybe you can see how to me, this felt like yuma trying to manipulate me into leaving him alone. yuma then makes this post:
I don't think you are anything and you certainly don't need to apologize. Someone can feel frustrated with another player for reasons that aren't rude/mean/whatever.
so I am relieved because apparently it is not personal. I continue to play the game normally, but yuma still seems annoyed. Then I have this feeling that yuma's posts are almost all not doing scumhunting stuff. I know that voting for yuma will re-trigger all this emotional stuff, but I also do not want to be in a game where I cannot vote for a player that I believe is scummy because that player might hold a grudge against me.
I try to back up my feeling about yuma's contributions, so I do a reread. Doig a post-by-post, I realize he indeed has not expressed any read other than the one on me/Teproc. Granted, it is early in the game, but given that it is yuma and given his activity level so far, I found this worth noticing and thus I posted a summary of all his posts. It is certainly not meant as a guide to show how every single one of yuma's posts is scummy, because that would be ridiculous. But I hoped it would back up my feeling that yuma seemed disinterested in doing actual scumhunting.
I call it OMGUS because obviously yuma has his reaction, and subsequent vote for me, after I vote for him, and at least in part because I am voting for him.
But now this catches me entirely off guard:
Post 11 - implying that I am arrogant You are
I have no idea how I should react to this. I thought you had nothing personally against me (see the earlier quoted post), now this. I of course cannot be the judge of whether or not I am arrogant, or whether or not my posts convey that I am. I know I am trying not to be, and if I am failing, I am deeply and truly sorry. I would love to know what I did to produce this image, but I see that this is not the time and place for this discussion. And I have to consider the option that this is fake because after all we are playing a game of mafia.
But know that if it is fake, while I see that one might debate this is within the rules and within the civility pledge, it is not the way I want to play this game. I understand that yuma, should he have faked this, can of course not back out now, so I am simply stating this for future games. But this is also why yuma's accusation of me pushing his buttons seems so off base for me: because that is absolutely not the way I want this game played, and I would never play that way, and I thought others knew this about me.
And if it is not fake, well obviously my continued presence in this game will make it unpleasant for both yuma and me, so unless we can settle this somehow, I would prefer to be replaced by somebody else.