DSC and I slog through a 21-turn game with stupid Altar decks on a terrible board.The board in question:
Candlestick Maker, Secret Chamber, Oasis, Shanty Town, Throne Room, Mine, Rogue, Venture, Adventurer, Altar
It's not instantly obvious that the entire board is terrible. Altar isn't useful because you don't want any of the $5s en masse (except possibly Venture). Rogue doesn't have the deck density to be really strong. Throne Room has mediocre targets. Oasis is a straight trap. Shanty Town is basically a Necropolis. CMs are easy to overbuy. So naturally, between us, we make literally all of those mistakes, prompting us to play the board again, restricted to Rogue-BM vs. Mine-BM.
WE PROGRESS TO GAME 2!We beat our previous selves by five turns.Game 2 transcript:
ST: should we start CM or Silver?
dsc: i'm going silver+CM
dsc: coins are cumulative
dsc: early is better!
dsc: see, my T3 seems way better
dsc: ... unless you hit my MINE next turn
ST: ah, the classic Doublemine strategy
I immediately hit one of the Mines with Rogue.
dsc: ...
ST: HA
ST: bet you're glad you took that second Mine
dsc: yes.
dsc: i also hired some extra adventurers to work it
dsc: nooo
I play the Rogue, picking up the Silver over the Mine.
ST: I don't even want your !@#$!@#$ Mine
dsc: your disdain stings
I play the Rogue again and take the Mine.
dsc: SUCKA
ST: this is my favorite
ST: a classic for the ages
dsc: DOUBLEMINE
dsc: UNSTOPPABLE
ST: I WIN
dsc: SHOCKING
dsc: okay.
dsc: thank god
dsc: MINE *really was* a terrible buy
ST: Notice the turn count.
dsc: yeah
dsc: 21
ST: We were both at least four turns better than last time
dsc: last time
dsc: i would have CRUSHED you with D-MINE
ST: I'm posting this to Greatest Moments
dsc: i wonder if it's possible to build a winning deck on this board that contains MINE
dsc: *bonus points for maximal number of mines purchased
ST: Well, obviously, it depends on the quality of your opponent's play
dsc: i'm thinking like: what part of the spread can MINE-X beat?
dsc: 30% of the decks? 60%
dsc: it clearly loses to adequate/non-exhausted players piloting BM
ST: I mean, the only lesson to be learned here is that sometimes we overcomplicate ****
dsc: ...and that most the cards here sucked as bad as we thought
dsc: thank goodness we tested how hard that wall was with our skulls!
ST: haha.
dsc: i suppose it could have been slightly worse
dsc: we could have had Possession
ST: well
ST: there are all sorts of things we could have had that would have made this less bad
dsc: which goes nicely with rogue
ST: either by making it even worse and preventing our stupidity
ST: or by making it better
dsc: ha
dsc: oh man
dsc: i wonder how we could make this board MORE trap-y
ST: the best part about this board is that it's not instantly obvious that it is truly awful
dsc: exactly!
dsc: i think it really needs Market Square
dsc: all the trashing is $5+
dsc: Maybe Pirate Ship? oo! or University!
dsc: University: Worse Than Altar!
ST: ...University would be horrifying]
ST: although I wonder if you add more trap cards if it just makes the trap-ness more obvious
ST: like, I'd start considering University and then wonder what the **** I intend to pick up with University
ST: then stop and go Rogue-BM
dsc: ALL THE SHANTYS
dsc: it's funny
dsc: the board really hinges on having Existant But Implausible trashing
ST: "Implausible Trashing" should be a standard Dominion term
dsc: like if you add even ******* Trade Route, all of a sudden the Venture loop is quite good
ST: you have strong trashing like Steward, weak trashing like Develop, and implausible trashing like Altar
dsc: my
dsc: favourite
dsc: is getting out from under Cultist with Procession
dsc: people are like ...
dsc: BUT IT WORKS
dsc: (*for some definition of "works")
ST: It works
ST: it's just, well, glacial
dsc: i forget why i ended up doing it
ST: while you're doing that I could build a Scout-Great Hall deck without +Buy
dsc: oh ****
ST: hm?
dsc: i know what Trapville needs
dsc: motherfscking DEATH CART
ST: I feel like Death Cart would be actively helpful after the opening
ST: gets you to $8, clears out the bad decisions you made earlier