This one's not really a parody, but I used a picture of Annette the six-year-old mummy queen empress penguin...
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Mummy
Duration
Cost: 4
You may trash a treasure from your hand. If you do, you may trash a Curse from your hand.
While this card is in play, any other player who gains a treasure also gains a Curse.
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(I could give this the Action-Attack-Duration type, but there aren't any cards like that, and I suspect it would be confusing or even inconsistent with some reaction cards.)
(Also, it needs to do something specific on the next turn of the person who plays it, or otherwise it won't actually remain in play according to the Duration rules.)
Sounds sort of pointless, as far as rules go.
Maybe so, but that's what the rule is! A Duration is discarded from play during "the cleanup phase of the last turn in which it does something". And while-in-play effects don't count as "doing something"; this isn't explicitly stated in the rules, but is inferrable from the behavior of Lighthouse.
I could make it do something stupid like discard itself at the start of your cleanup phase.
That… might actually work, as a nice end-run around that rule. "Discard this on your next turn at the start of your cleanup phase." Does it tell you to do something on your next turn? Yes it does, and that seems sufficient for not discarding it from play on this turn.
I thought the rule to keep it in play was just to make it easier to remember and to balance how often you're capable of playing them.
That's what it's
for, but the way the rule is
written is this hinky thing that doesn't make Duration cards actually stay in play unless they've got something for you to do after the current cleanup phase.
I didn't see any remarks on Outpost about whether you keep it in play or not even if you play it during your Outpost turn... I would think that you would have to, but if it "does nothing", by the rule you state, it shouldn't stay out... unless "do something unless X, in which case it doesn't do anything" is still "doing something" even if X means that it does nothing... Head explode.
Outpost is kind of the oddball here, and the rule explanations don't really make sense to me, but I'm pretty sure you do leave it in play even if it isn't going to give you an extra turn, because somehow the card doesn't "find out" that it's not giving you an extra turn until too late.