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Author Topic: A Geeky Story (A story I wrote when I was 10)  (Read 1973 times)

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Seprix

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A Geeky Story (A story I wrote when I was 10)
« on: September 11, 2016, 11:12:19 pm »
+3

Just for a bit of context, I wrote this semi-story long ago when I was about 9-10 years old. I forgot I still had it stored away somewhere, and I stumbled upon it today. It gave me some great memories, and who knows, maybe someone will like a story written by a 10 year old version of an f.ds member. It's pretty awful, although it has some neat and potentially useful ideas.

The story will be written, with all the bad spelling and grammar included. There are 10 short chapters written, totaling about ten pages, front and back. When needed, some annotation will be added for sentence clarity, though it is not really needed for the most part. Part of Chapter 3, all of Chapter 4, and the beginning of Chapter 5 are missing. I will give a brief overview of what happened in those chapters to the best of my ability, though memory slightly fails me as to specifics.

Enjoy the story.


A Geeky Story

Once upon a time, there was a person named Peter. As his title suggested, Peter was not very smart. 1 I don't know wh gave him the title, or if he made it himself, though that wasn't likely, as he was not the brightest bulb on the block. The smartest guy on the block was called Bright M. Ethod, though he perferred Bright. And though Peter wasn't the smartest, he wasn't the dumbest either. That was Doug. He lived down the road.

Peter lived next door to a guy who constantly wore an Indian hat 2, and had glasses. His name was Jones. Jones had a strange habit. Every day, he would go bury a pineapple, then at night, he would go dig it back up. There was also another bright person accross the street. His name was Percy. Percy was only second brightest for one reason: Bright had a Phd, while Percy had an ordinary degree. Now that we have introduced our characters, let's get on with our story, meeting new fellows as we go along.

1

It was a beautiful day in Simpleton City. The sun was shining, the birds were singing, and Jones was burying his pineapple. "There," he exclaimed. "Now that I have buried my fruity pineapple, I shall have my breakfast."
And he proceeded inside, to the comfort of his home. However, he exclaimed as he got inside, "Oh, yes. I forgot to buy donuts!" And he proceeded outside to go get donuts at Kilt's, the trendiest store in Simpleton City.

When Jones reached Kilt's, he went inside to go buy donuts. He reached for a shopping kart 3, and went inside. There were many isles, and he went down the one with donuts. On the way, Jones saw a box of Pop-Smarts. He hates that pastry, primarily because he couldn't figure out how to get the wrapper off. Jones frowned, then shook his head. He came here to buy donuts. Pop-Smarts wouldn't ruin his day.

Jones got to the donuts, picked them up, and checked the price. They were $30.00 per dozen. That seemed like a good price. Jones smirked. He had gotten away with a steal. He proceeded to the cash register, and got out his large stack of pennies in a jar. "Sigh," Jones said. This was the boring part. He hoped the cash register guy could count. Thankfully, he could, and the process only took 15 minutes. Jones got into his car, and drove to work, eating donuts on the way.

Work was boring for Jones, and he didn't like it. He saw Peter, and walked over to him. "Hey, Pete." Jones said to Peter. "It's Peter," Peter said, slightly irritated. "What do you want?" "Just saying hi, Pete." Jones said. "Peter.", Peter said though gritted teeth. Jones continued like Peter never said anything. "Also, don't you hate work?" "No," said Peter, obviously annoyed now. "No, I don't." Jones shrugged, and walked away to start making toothpaste at the factory.

2

After Jones left, Peter shook his head. Jones bugged him. However, the task of putting caps on every bottle of toothpaste awaited him, and if he wanted free toothpaste, he had to cap 8,000 bottles in a week, for it was work for toothpaste week. He started capping bottles, tubes, and cans of toothpaste. This was an important job. Everyone used toothpaste to fight cavities, glue stuff together, and it was even going on little Timmy from across the lane's birthday cake next Saturday! It was fun to think of these things.

Fun or not, Peter was tired when he got home. Jones was already home, and digging up his pineapple. Peter wondered what was wrong with that man. Then Peter remembered he had to go get a saltshaker as a present for little Timmy. He wished he could write that down, but he couldn't write. It looked like a trip to Percy's house was going to happen.

After a delightful dinner of toothpaste sandwiches and Goat milk, Peter decided to go to Percy's house. He walked outside, and noted that his lawn needed a trim. He couldn't write that either, so now a trip to Percy's was unavoidable. He really needed to know how to read and write. Oh well, he might as well get on with his life. Peter reached Percy's house, and knocked. After awhile, Percy opened the door. "What do you want written THIS time?" he asked in a dull voice. "I need to mow my lawn, and get a saltshaker for little Timmy," Peter said. "Oh, yes, and a box of donuts, too." "If you can't read, then why do you ask me to write this stuff?" Percy said. "It's rediculously stupid." Peter thought about that, and decided that it would be nice to talk about peanuts, as they seemed good at the moment. "You know," Peter said. "Peanuts do taste quite-" SLAM! Percy's door shut, and Peter was standing there on the doorstep, wondering why Percy was so rude.

3

The next day, Doug woke up from his bed, and had a box of donuts. As he chewed the pepper flavored one, the newspaper came in. He couldn't read it, but he could ask Percy or Bright what the headlines were. Doug finished his donuts, and decided he liked the grass flavored one the best.

Doug headed out to Percy's house, as he figured nobody would bug Percy. That was probably the smartest thing Doug has ever thought of. Unfortunately, it was Saturday, and Percy was sleeping in. Doug knocked on the door. No answer. Doug knocked again. Nothing. Doug rang the doorbell, and Percy opened the door, in a robe.

"Can you read the headline for me?" Doug said. "I would like to know what it is." "Well, I was sleeping," Percy said. "But oh well. It says that Election day is coming close, and only Bright M. Ethod is a candidate."

Here is where a couple of pages are missing. To summarize what happened, Doug decides to run for office, to the chastisement of Percy. After Doug leaves, Percy thinks about how awful life is for him, and whines to Sabrina, a would-be love interest for Percy. Sabrina is not interested and does mock him over his feelings in some fashion. Bright speaks to the 99 smart people in Simpleton City, and Doug also sets up a stage for a speech, where the story picks up in Chapter 5. A character called Greg is also introduced, who is neither smart or dumb, but average.

5

...Doug began to step onto the stage. Doug slipped, and fell. Cheering began. Cheering by smart people for getting hurt, and cheering by dumb people for a great show. Doug got back up, and walked to the podium. "I uh..." Doug began. "Uh..."

The crowd was beginning to mummur. Was this the guy we wanted to elect?

"I uh..." Doug continued. "I forgot my speech."

The crowd immidiatly (and not suprisingly) cheered for Doug. Percy sighed. Now Doug was certain to win. There were only 98 smart people in the city excluding Bright, and literally thousands of dumb people waiting to elect Doug. It was over, and Percy knew it.

6

"I don't believe it." said Percy. "I don't believe it." Bright had won with 98 votes, and Doug with 0. "I think people were too stupid to know how to vote," Sabrina's silky voice said. "Bright won, and now it will be bright for us again!" She giggled, and walked off to the Geekatarian party tents, where everyone was celebrating.

Percy walked into Doug, and Doug fell over. Doug got up, but didn't act like Doug anymore. Percy asked, "are you okay?" "Why yes, yes I am." said Doug. "My superior ceribral cortex estimates that I shouldn't be harmed." "Did you just say that, Doug?" Percy stammered. "Yes." Doug said. "Though I don't remember who I am. Am I this Doug, to whom you are referring?"
"Don't you remember, Doug?" Percy said, a tone of fright in his voice. "You were the leader of the Dumbo party!" "Truly?" Doug said. "Very well. But what does the Dumbo party do?"

This moment was the time most regretted by Percy. "Fight against the Geekatarian Party," Percy said. "But we already on. Bright is the head of the city, now." "Hmmm..." Doug obviously thinking. "I had better be off. Where is my house?" "On Dunce Road, turn at Bonehead Lane, your house is the first one." Percy said. "Do you need help driving?" "No, no."Doug said. "I can drive. I just don't know who I am." "You are Doug-" Percy began. "Enough!" Doug said. "I know. I must be leaving. Good day." And Doug went off, leaving Percy perplexed.

7

The following day had a certain uneasyness. For one day, Jones didn't bury his pineapple. For another thing, little Timmy from accross the lane's party has been moved to tomorrow. That was very strange, for little Timmy was an adamant short adult man, and not a kid as most of you probably thought. Adamant means sticking to something, and not letting go easily, so you can imagine how strange that was. Also, though the Smart people were being treated more rudely than ever, all of them were being invited to little Timmy from across the lane's party.

And Peter still hadn't gotten a saltshaker. Rather, he was mumbling about getting Timmy mini pies. In fact, that was what all of the townspeople who were not smart wanted to get little Timmy from across the lane: mini pies. All of these rumors reached the ears of Bright and Percy, and all the rest of the Geekatarian party.

And nevertheless of all the pushing, shoving, hair pulling, name calling, food fights, forced donut eating, and other crude things that would annoy only those of the higher intellect, all 99 geniuses were planning to go to that party, because it meant free cake. And who could turn that down? Certainly not me. I'm sure you wouldn't. And all 99 Geekatarian members were surprised that the whole population of the city was at the party. They were also surprised when all of little Timmy from across the lane's presents were mini-pies. But when everyone except for our smart 99 people grabbed a pie or two, and surrounded our 99 smart people, the realized. It wasn't a party. It was a trap, made by the smarter Doug, who wished to be the ruler of the city.

8

A fight ensued. At first, all seemed to be going for the Dumbo party. But all of the idiots surrounding the 99 started eating pie. Our 99 got away, and Doug was furious. Dour immediately began to run a program to make the stupid smart. Training camps were set up. The simplest instructions were issued. But for all this perparation, the forever stupid just didn't seem to get it.

The Geekatarian Party; meanwhile, had plans as well. Bright and other leading smart people began to devise a plan. And some defenses. They also discussed Doug's brilliance. "I have no idea how he got this brain power." Percy said, munching a Pop-Smart. "You must be turning stupid, Percy." Sabrina said with a smile. "It's obvious that when Doug got hit in the cerebellum, he had a click in his head that made him smart." "Funny, all of the stuff we tried to teach him in the past is out to get us." Greg said. "I may not be smart, but I am sure as heck not dumb either." Then they began devising a plan.

Doug finally found an incentive. Those Greasy Bob Donuts. Now the battle begins. And one final fail-safe for Doug to set up...

9

Doug have an ultra complex speech, that confused the stupid side of Simpleton City more than ever. The plan was simple. They had to throw the pies AT Bright and Co. The stupid people finally got it.

Bright's plan was pretty much the same. Chuck pies, and don't get hit. A chubby guy by the name of Edward moaned at the waste of pie. "Oh, do be quiet." Percy said. "It's for a good cause." The two sides lined up. Both sides lined up. It was quiet. Stares of concentration occured. Someone blinked. "Ha! I win!" someone else shouted, obviously playing a game no one else was playing. Doug shushed the man up, and it became quiet again. Bright demanded surrender. Doug said no. The smart group charged quickly. Pies flew through the air. The stupid fought back, but with the smart throwing calculated throws, they fell back.

"This is too easy!" Greg shouted at Percy. Percy smirked, and said, "They're stupid, remember?" Greg began thinking. The Dumbo group was losing, and Doug didn't seem to care. There was some sort of trap here. There had to be.

Doug wondered anxiously whether the loss was looking too great. If his plan was to work, he had to lose, and turn stupid again. But he had to make his loss more convincing. "Spring the trap." Doug said. "Yes, sir," Jones said.

The earth shook. A huge gap was appearing around the battlers in the ground. Inside, a bunch of pineapples were lying around. There were also tons of stupid reinforcements. "I never thought there would be a trap!" Bright shouted. "They are too stupid!" The Geekatarian Party was losing. Doug's voice cackled in the speakers around the gap. "Surrender!", Doug shouted. The words "surrender" echoed throughout the battlefield. All the stupid people stopped fighting. They began tossing pies on the ground. Or eating. The stupid surrendered, just like Doug ordered, though that was not what Doug intended.

"Get away!" Doug screeched. He ran from the pursuing 99, but tripped. Doug's head hit the ground hard. Doug didn't seem smart when he got up. And he wasn't. Doug was back, for real.

10

All was well again. Edward continued making Pop-Smarts, Greg continued to do what average people do, and Percy began writing a history of the city. He finished a month afterwards. He included all that had transpired in this book. I suppose you are wondering who wrote this book. Well, stop wondering, and look at the title. Or the cover. Or the back jacket, if this makes hard cover for some reason. I had nothing to do with the events of this book, but I certainly have something to do with the next book, assuming I get around to writing it. You know, I could lose my memory, or my marbles, or my marble collection. Any one of these could deter me from writing the second book. When most people narrarate in books, they are all like, "don't read this. It is a secret. It's too sad." I encourage you to read this, the main reason being the more you read, the less stupid you are.

END

Annotations

1. The title of the story was originally called 'Peter The Not-Very-Smart'. I changed the title to 'A Geeky Story' later on when Peter was no longer the main character of the story. This sentence only makes complete sense with that knowledge.

2. A Native American headdress. You must pardon my lack of vernacular.

3. This poor spelling was actually intentional, because the store was named Kilt's.

Final Words

I had planned a sequel, where Doug obviously faked his stupidity. Doug would end up inventing a stupid ray, and would shoot Bright with it, and basically use it by himself to make everyone dumb.

So yeah, that's the awful story I wrote from ages ago. There were some clever bits, but most of it was just hilarious lameness. Why am I sharing this obviously embarrassing story? Because I felt like it. Also, there were some f.dsian memes, such as explaining jokes. I was an f.dser before it was cool, it seems.
« Last Edit: September 12, 2016, 12:15:03 pm by Seprix »
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Roadrunner7671

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Re: A Geeky Story (A story I wrote when I was 10)
« Reply #1 on: September 11, 2016, 11:28:33 pm »
+1

You must've done a lot of drugs as a 10 year old. I enjoyed your story.
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Seprix

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Re: A Geeky Story (A story I wrote when I was 10)
« Reply #2 on: September 11, 2016, 11:30:59 pm »
0

You must've done a lot of drugs as a 10 year old. I enjoyed your story.

Asprin is a hell of a drug.
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Re: A Geeky Story (A story I wrote when I was 10)
« Reply #3 on: September 12, 2016, 09:40:44 am »
+1

Good story, Seprix! When I was 10, I never could have focused on one thing long enough to right a story like this.
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Kuildeous

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Re: A Geeky Story (A story I wrote when I was 10)
« Reply #4 on: September 12, 2016, 10:37:39 am »
+1

Quote
"Ha! I win!" someone else shouted, obviously playing a game no one else was playing.

Story of my life.

I found the story utterly charming. It was goofy as hell, which is what I would expect from a 10-year-old. And I think there’s a desire among us geeky kids to be as goofy as possible with absurd humor. I remember writing an ongoing story in my journal with a cop/adventurer named Cojack-of-all-trades.

I kind of wish I still had one of my first real stories. I can’t remember if this predates Cojack-of-all-trades or not, but it was the first story I seriously sat down to write. It was my first typed story, and it was on an Apple. It was also my first harsh lesson about saving often, as I had lost portions of my story and had to retype them. This was with the support of my 7th-grade English teacher, so I suppose I was 13 years old.

It was a first-person account of a cop that investigated a haunted house. I had issues with the word “singeing” due to some weird dream sequence of fire tornados singing cacti. I adhered too closely to the notion of dropping the E when adding ING. So this cop entered this house for some reason. He got caught up in a couple of horror rooms. There were skeletons sitting around a dining room table who animated and attacked the protagonist. I do remember him getting behind a skeleton and pulling back on his skull until it popped off. A fire was ignited, and the poor cop got away and had to explain why he set a house on fire. It was a bummer ending for him. Somehow I typed up a Lovecraftian ending before I even knew who Lovecraft was.

I’m sure I’d be mortified if I could find that story. Still, it stuck in my memory after all these years.
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ashersky

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Re: A Geeky Story (A story I wrote when I was 10)
« Reply #5 on: September 12, 2016, 10:45:51 am »
+2

Toothpaste factory?  Way to rip off Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, dude.

Also, why has this not been flavor for a Mafia game?
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Seprix

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Re: A Geeky Story (A story I wrote when I was 10)
« Reply #6 on: September 12, 2016, 12:12:42 pm »
0

Toothpaste factory?  Way to rip off Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, dude.

Also, why has this not been flavor for a Mafia game?

I don't think I watched Charlie and the Chocolate Factory then, and if I did, I didn't remember, mainly because I don't remember being aware of it now. I have ripped off ideas before when I was little (such as writing songs with clear Oasis lyrics and passing them as my own, which my Dad laughed at), but I did try to be as original as possible for that story.
« Last Edit: September 12, 2016, 12:15:42 pm by Seprix »
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